


In My Head

by theFateofYou



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: After Haven, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Leliana breaks open a door, Mage-Templar War, Mages, Nightmares, Pain, Romance, Skyhold, Solas Being Solas, Sweet, The Anchor (Dragon Age)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-25
Updated: 2018-09-25
Packaged: 2019-07-17 12:39:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16095848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theFateofYou/pseuds/theFateofYou
Summary: A few months after the mage nightmarish future and the attack on Haven, Solas becomes aware of Mathelina calling to him from the fade. Havoc ensues as he tries to wake her from the nightmare.





	In My Head

It had been two months since their capture of Alexius and freeing of the mages. Two months since she witnessed that horrible future; a future only she and Dorian remembered. Then Corypheus appeared, haven was destroyed, and it gave the elf and Tevinter another reason to drink together. The two hiding from Mother Giselle behind piles of books; the whiskey making their throats numb and voices hoarse. For Dorian, the drinking seemed to help and he returned to a more cheery albeit surly demeanor. Throwing books around, and giving half-hearted snide comments.

It was different for Mathelina. First, she changed her name after they arrived at Skyhold. It was easier for outsiders who had only known her as Lavellan but her party struggled more. Constantly slipping up and calling her Sulan, or Nina in Sera’s case. All mistakes where met with a tired glare and Solas mumbling a correction for the confused member. Solas was the only one who never slipped up, easily switching from one name to another. Perhaps it was because he understood the name change; to take the name of an ancient Elvhen leader, not that of a child. The second change was Mathelina in general. The excitable archer now held a stern concentration much more similar to her constant apostate companion. The weight of Haven resting on her brow as she plotted the inquisitions movements and passed judgement on the foul. Tales soon began to sprout up around her of the hard justice of the Inquisition, and of the same justice that would be exacted against Corypheus should he show his face again. 

It was only through coaxing and drink with her more merry companions that her youthful self returned; only to disappear with morning light. They all had made comment on her change in one way or another. Varric especially showed his concern, taking Mathelina up to the rafters to talk; he was just as successful as he was with Hawke. Both archers shaking their head and shrugging it off with a weak smile. Mathelina only nodded along, reassuring him that she was just tired, or sad, or bored. Or any number of excuses that Varric knew was not the real heart of the problem. No one could place what was eating away at her, not even Solas who spent much of the days by her side. Telling her tales of the fade and of the Elvhen. If anyone it was her lover that could bring her focus back around to the present. Her reddish brown eyes shining with light as he told her of the ancient past. 

Many assumed it was simply haven’s loss that plagued her thoughts and that it would fade with time. It all made sense at the end of the second month. Mathelina was fast asleep in her room, the door bolted shut and windows fastened against the cold. She tossed and turned in the thick Orlesian covers, throwing them off the bed in her thrashing fit. Her brow had furrowed, and a thin sheen of sweat had formed on her skin despite the cold. Her lips mumbled, quite Dalish cries as nightmare slowly ate at her mind. It wasn't he first time nightmares plagued her, and it wouldn't be the last. To see so much death, to have caused it. These were things that you could never truly shake, and that would eat away at you in sleep.

Solas had fallen asleep in his usual spot on a couch in the rotunda. A book covering his face to block out the slowly dwindling candle light of the second floor library. As always, his mind traversed the fade. Speaking with old friends and occasionally spying on the dreams of his living companions as well. He did this less though after he stumbled upon Cassandra’s dream; a shirtless knight with a very long sword had accompanied her. Solas couldn’t look at the seeker for days. This time he heard someone call out for him. His name echoing on the wind, and he almost thought it was just a teasing spirit if he didn’t hear it again. Louder and more fearful this time, and Solas moved to chase it. The voice was so familiar, and instantly recognized it as his name was yelled a third time; or rather screamed. Mathelina sounded like she was in agony, real life agony. And with that thought, Solas vaulted off the couch. The waves of sleep shaken off as he looked around, worried that attackers were upon the building. He made his way for the door to the main hall, fully awake and sprinting for the inquisitor's room. 

He sprinted past Varric, asleep in his chair and up past the throne. His bare feet pounding against the stone. In the back of his waking mind, Mathelina screamed again; no longer a name but just a long, horrid scream. Was she under attack? Had Corypheus reached her through the fade? Solas wished he could move faster, as he pulled the door open. That the constraints of the living world would just give and he could teleport there. But he was stuck in reality, and the wind seemed to move against him. He yelled out as he ran, “Mathelina! Someone quick! To the Inquisitor!” 

Using his skill with the fade, the apostate sent the call out to his sleeping companion as he climbed the stairs. The rousing of arms was heard behind him, only to be blocked by another scream. This time aloud and echoing down the stairs of the tower. The others were quick to follow, all in some semblance of weaponry as they raced to the hand of their leader. Solas was the fastest of them all, skipping the stairs all together and running up the railing.“Hold on vhenan!”

Solas reaches the door, his face screwing up in frustration at the bolted lock and with a whim that metal froze over. Still it would not give as he shook and pushed against the door. The apostate jumped as Liliana reached the door, kicking the frozen lock open with expert grace and sent it swinging hard on its hinges. With a look behind him, Solas could see Vivienne, Dorian, and Varric all following behind; their faces displaying various levels of worry and fear. More to follow from the shouts coming from down below. For a moment Solas thought he has summoned too many if this was a fade issue but another scream echoed and a violent green flash came to view; illuminating the stairs for a moment before fading. Solas felt his stomach drop, and ran past Leliana, taking the stairs two at a time and vaulting over the banister. “Vhenan!”

His staff was already raised, ready to defend his lover against whatever monster Corypheus sent. But there was no intruder in sight, the room woefully empty down to the bed. His eyes swam around the room til he spotted Mathelina in a pile of sheets. Curled up on the floor, clutching her marked hand close to her chest. Violent arcs of green lightning lanced around her, illuminating the tears that wet her cheek. Her lips had pulled back over her teeth, now clenched in pain. Her whole body tensed and curled further inward as her Mark reacted violently again. The rest of her party made it up the stairs, even Sera who was the farthest away; all looking at her with horror and worry. Sera thought she going to be sick, Bull's hand tighten on his axe. All three wizards came in closer, the only ones who felt comfortable despite the danger. Vivienne quickly cast up a barrier around the mages and Mathelina; containing the magic within the small field so the mark's violent reaction could not harm the outside folk. Solas ran to her side, ignoring the magic and pulling Mathelina into his lap. "Vhenan, I'm here. What has happened." he called out to her stroking her face. Only, she was still asleep. Her breathing rapid, pulse stuttering, and her limbs seemed to have a distinct green tinge to them. 

Solas looked back and forth between Dorian and Vivienne; both now close enough to notice the Inquisitor's still asleep state. "Should we wake her?" Dorian questioned, quickly defering to the elf. This was the fade, only Solas really had any idea of how to handle this. Vivienne nodded, her face an unusual calm as she kept the worry far from her brow. Solas shook his head, tightening his grip on Mathelina as the mark shook her body; holding her head tight to his chest so she couldn't smack it against the floor. "If we wake her, this could continue. I need to find the root of the problem."

The mages nodded, "Just get back here quick. And bring her back to us Solas." Dorian mumbled, pulling back to watch the surrounding area. A slight heavy worry was in the air. With the anchor ripping through the space, how long before a rift was opened? And how long before demons began to spill through the cracks? Solas quickly closed his eyes, resting his forehead against Mathelina's. "I'm here vhenan. Show me what is wrong."

And then, he was back at Redcliffe castle. Only, the world was manipulated. Red lyrium growing from the walls, horrifying monsters walked the ruined walls. None took notice of him, this was a dream. Mathelina's dream. The true pain was only were she was. So he ran, and in the fade he was faster than thought. Quickly racing through the halls, his eyes widening as he saw the corrupted bodies of Varric and Cassandra laying outside of the throne room doors. Lyrium crystals growing from their skin. He walked straight through the doors, and there he saw Mathelina. The woman firing arrow after arrow as Dorian worked on casting some spell; a slow portal growing. A vision of him, red eyed and ill, and Leliana fighting back demons. His brow furrowed, this was no dream. It was too clear, too sharp. This was a memory. But, redcliffe had never been like this...It dawned on Solas. The possible future she had witnessed, the little she had said about it. It all clicked together as he watched the fade version of him die; impaled on the end of a sword. He flinched, feeling the wound subconsciously. 

There was a shift then. The memory shifting into a nightmare. Dorian fell, the risen ghost of Alexius turning him into ash and the portal died; trapping her here. Mathelina let out a shriek as she watched her friends die off. Quickly running to the body of Solas, cradling it as she glared at the incoming demons; expecting death. No wonder she had been so changed. The pain that haunted her...losing friends and loved ones. Solas quickly walked over to her. Placing a gentle hand on her shoulder, and she looked up. Eyes going wide before going back to the dead Solas in her arms. "Solas, I don't..." she trailed off, her voice hiccuped by tears and fear.

"This is not real vhenan. It is but a nightmare." he held out a hand, begging her to take it. To let him change the horrid view around her. She sobbed, shaking her head. "But it wasn't! It was real...I saw...I saw you die." she wailed, leaning her head forward onto the dead form. Solas knelt down, pulling her back to his hip. "Vhenan, we can change this. But you must let this go. This will never happen." he murmured, kissing her forehead gently. Mathelina sobbed, but she took the stretched out hand. He was here, nothing could go wrong with him here. The view changed. The ruined castle fading away and turning into a bright meadow of grass and flowers. A gentle wind whistled past, and the laughter of children could be heard a little way off. Solas stood, pulling Mathelina up with him. "This was where I grew up. Fields like these that stretched for miles and miles." he smiled faintly, "Come, I will show you my home."

In the waking world, Mathelina began to calm. The violent arcs of green energy fading away as her breathing steadied. The two elves were huddled against each other, snoring faintly. The party relaxed, weapons sheathed, and many headed back down. Making plans to question the two in the morning when they woke. Only Bull stayed, taking the time to pick up the two elves and gently place them on Mathelina's bed. "Sleep well kids." he snorted, following after Sera; already complaining about the shitty fade.


End file.
